We usually think a ‘gift with strings attached’ is a bad thing, but the Torah actually forbids giving without them.
No Free Gifts | Terumah, Purim & The Language of Reciprocity
There is no such thing as a free gift.
In this episode of Madlik Disruptive Torah, Geoffrey Stern and Rabbi Adam Mintz explore Parshat Terumah through the provocative lens of French sociologist Marcel Mauss and his groundbreaking work The Gift.
Mauss argued that the “pure gift” is a myth — that gifts are never free. They create obligation. They generate return. They bind giver and recipient into cycles of reciprocity.
Sound familiar?
The Torah commands:
“וְיִקְחוּ־לִי תְּרוּמָה” — Let them take for Me a gift.
Why does giving sound like taking?
Why does Rashi translate ratzon using the Old French apaisement — appeasement, reconciliation?
And why is the only explicit mitzvah of gift-giving in the Torah found not in charity — but in mishloach manot on Purim?
From the building of the Mishkan to the halachic details of sending two portions to one friend, this episode uncovers gifting as something far deeper than generosity. It is not charity. It is not sentimentality. It is a structured exchange that counters Haman’s accusation that the Jews are “scattered and divided.”
Along the way:
- The surprising grammar of “taking” a gift
- Rashi’s French and what it reveals about reciprocity
- The anthropology of the potlatch
- Why we don’t make a bracha on mishloach manot
- The social psychology behind Purim gift exchange
- Rabbi Riskin’s insight on cooked food and kashrut
- And what Chinese New Year flower markets in Hong Kong can teach us about ritual exchange
Terumah and Purim begin speaking the same language.
Not a sacred economy.
A language.
The language of reciprocity.
Key Takeaways
- Every gift binds.
- Giving is a language.
- Reciprocity builds society.
Timestamps
[00:00] No Such Thing as a Free Gift: Torah Meets Anthropology
[00:43] Terumah & Purim: Gifting as Covenant and Community Glue
[01:57] Welcome to Madlik: What We’re Really Exploring This Week
[02:36] Hong Kong & Chinese New Year: Ritual Exchange in Real Life
[04:33] Exodus 25 ‘Take for Me a Gift’: The Strange Language of Terumah
[06:21] Rashi’s French ‘Apaisement’: Gifts, Favor, and Propitiation
[12:24] Marcel Mauss’ The Gift: Reciprocity vs. Utilitarianism
[14:33] Potlatch, Honor, and Sacrifice: When Gifts Demand a Return
[19:06] Sponsor Break: Voice Gift Tag (A Gift That Speaks)
[20:00] Purim’s Unique Mitzvah: Mishloach Manot as Required Reciprocity
[21:38] Why No Blessing on Charity? Fixed Measures & Receiver Dependence
[23:30] Megillat Esther’s Two Gifts: Friends vs. the Poor
[24:48] Halakhic Details: What Counts as Mishloach Manot (and Why)
[28:18] Talmud Stories: Reading Meaning into the Gifts We Send
[31:35] Meals, Kashrut, and Unity: Maimonides & Rabbi Riskin’s Take
[32:50] Closing Blessings: Shabbat Shalom and Heading Toward Purim
Links & Learnings
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Sefaria Source Sheet: https://voices.sefaria.org/sheets/709029
Transcript here: https://madlik.substack.com/
Geoffrey Stern [00:00:05]:
There is no such thing as a free gift, not in anthropology, not in the Torah, and not in Jewish life. In 1925, the French sociologist Marcel Mauss wrote a short but explosive book called The Gift. His claim was simple and unsettling. The pure gift is a myth. Across cultures and civilizations, gifts are never free. They create obligation. They generate return. They bind giver and recipient into cycles of reciprocity. A gift that demands nothing creates nothing. This week’s Parsha seems at first glance to be about generosity. Gold, silver, copper. Let them bring me gifts, God says. But the Hebrew is strange. Vayichu li trumah. Let them take from me a gift. Giving is taken as something obligatory, required, essential. The ability to give becomes the grammar of a covenantal society. And then there is Purim. We are commanded, Mishloach Manot, send portions one to another. Not optional kindness, not gifts to the poor. A structured exchange, a ritual circulation of giving that counters Haman’s charge that we are a scattered and divided. Suddenly, Terumah and Purim begin speaking the same language. The Torah does not treat gifting as charity. It treats gifting as communication. Gifts to God, gifts to each other, gifts that reconcile, obligate, and bind. Gifts that say, I get you. Not a sacred economy, a language. The language of reciprocity.
Welcome to Madlik. My name is Geoffrey Stern, and at Madlik, we light a spark or shed some light on a Jewish text or tradition. Along with Rabbi Adam Mintz, we host Madlik Disruptive Torah on your favorite podcast platform and now on YouTube and Substack. We also publish a source sheet on Sefaria, and a link is included in the show notes. This week we read Parashat Terumah. Most sermons this week will focus on the obligation of charity, tzedakah, but we dig a little deeper and explore the often overlooked language of exchanging gifts. So join us for No Free Gifts. Well, Rabbi, welcome. You are 13 hours ahead of us in Hong Kong. And my recollection of Hong Kong, I once went there for a wedding and there was a whole tea ceremony before with exchanging of things. There’s this red envelope that they exchange on Chinese New Year, which is happening right now. The whole ritual of exchanging gifts is highlighted in the Far East. I’m wondering, are you exposed to any of the festivities going on?
Adam Mintz [00:03:09]:
So I’m going to tell you something. Last night we went to the flower market. One of the gifts they exchange for Chinese New Year’s are flowers. Literally, there must have been 50,000 people who were at this flower market last night at 10:00 at night, buying flowers to exchange. Chinese New Year actually begins on Tuesday. So on Monday night, they’re actually— the flower market is open all night long so that people are there all night long buying flowers that they exchange. So I was thinking about that. It’s exactly the same tradition, this idea of exchanging gifts. So here, being in Hong Kong is just perfect for this.
Geoffrey Stern [00:03:58]:
You know, normally you read Terumah and I don’t focus on the gifting part. It’s always, you know, everybody has to provide their Terumah, their, their, their tzedakah. But we’ll see in a second that there definitely is a very strong gifting aspect. And of course, the only mitzvah that we have, to my knowledge, of gifting happens on Purim. Shalach manot is not gifts for the poor. That is matanot la’anim. This is literally to peers. So I think we’re going to have a fascinating little visit to the world of gifts in the Torah. We are in Exodus 25:1, and it says, God spoke to Moses saying, tell the Israelite people to bring me gifts. You shall accept gifts from me from every person whose heart is so moved. And these are the gifts that you shall accept from them: gold, silver, and copper. Our buddy Everett Fox is a little bit closer to the Tikchu et Terumati. He says, Speak to the children of Israel that they may take me a raised contribution from every man whose heart makes him willing. He says, and this is the contribution that you are to take from them: gold, silver, and bronze. So I, I read in between the lines there, Rabbi, that there’s something a little bit more complex about the gift giving than we would think as a triviality or maybe even a character trait. No, this is— we’re going to see the laws of, of of giving. What, what are your impressions of this?
Adam Mintz [00:05:37]:
Yeah, no, that’s right. You shall take a truma. I’ll just tell you a really interesting thing. The word natan in Hebrew, to give, is one of those words that is, that is whether you read it forwards or backwards, it’s the same word. Nun, tet, nun. It’s natan. And Rabbi Lookstein always liked to say that that’s the reciprocity of gift giving, that it’s about exactly what you said, is about creating relationships. And I’m going to send him this Madlik because he’s really going to enjoy the fact that the whole topic is based on that little dvar Torah that I heard from him many, many years ago.
Geoffrey Stern [00:06:19]:
That is fantastic. So Rashi says the following, yedavnu libo, the word yedavnu, that his heart kind of, our English translation was that his heart His heart makes him willing. Rashi says is the same root as nidava, and that is a goodwill gift. Goodwill. And then he’s going to start talking French, and we’re going to have quite a little French today because we’re also going to visit Marcel Mauss. But in Rashi’s words, it is apaisement in Old French. And Rashi is correctly referenced in two other Rashis that we’re going to visit because this apaisement, which, you know, could be translated to appeasement, Rabbi, is really saying something about gift giving already, that there is an ulterior motive, that there is a, I would say, a sociological and anthropological utility to this gift giving. He quotes two other times that Rashi uses this. In Genesis 33, it says, but Jacob said, no, I pray you, if you would do me this favor, accept from me this gift. So if you recall, this is where Jacob is leaving the house of Laban. He’s going to be reunited with his brother Esau. He is very concerned. They did not leave on good terms, and he’s sending gifts in front of him. And so Rashi on that says, and thou wast pleased with him, you are reconciled me. Whatever the term ratza, the verb or noun for ratzon, willing, occurs in scripture, it means propitiating. Old French, apaisement. English, appeasing. So here too, the, well, actually this is really a thing for him. It doesn’t even use the same Hebrew terms as we were using for Nadav. Here it is just willing Ratson, and he really understands at many different levels. He goes even further. He says, it shall not be l’ratson, acceptable as a sacrifice to you for the purpose of one of the purposes of the sacrifice is to conciliate and to propitiate. I really have to look that up in my SAT list.
Adam Mintz [00:08:47]:
Propitiate, I think. Yeah.
Geoffrey Stern [00:08:48]:
Propitiate. Okay. But again, he brings it even to God, that when you give a sacrifice to God, you are, in a sense, appeasing. You’re creating a conciliation with God. So, so Rashi is very— he really has focused on this in Leviticus. When you sacrifice an offering “l’ratzonchem”, this means as much as appeasement in Old French, favorable acceptance. This is the literal meaning of the verse. Our rabbis, however, taking the word in its primary sense of will, intention, learn from here as regards one who is handling a sacrifice that he does everything with intentionality. Either way you look at it, gifting or giving a sacrifice, no big surprise there, is not something that is unintentional. It has clear teleology. You want to achieve a certain end. But clearly, this is a Rashi thing.
Adam Mintz [00:09:49]:
Yeah, well, I mean, this is super fascinating because usually, Geoffrey, we don’t look at the French in the Rashi. Usually when we were in yeshiva, when Rashi quotes French, that was like a sign to say, skip this, don’t worry about it. Right. And what we’re really pointing out here is that Rashi connects it by using the same French word. That shows that Rashi has the same explanation. That’s absolutely fantastic.
Geoffrey Stern [00:10:20]:
And you could maybe go out on a limb and say that when Rashi has to dig deep and go to his native language of French, it’s because he thinks there’s something potentially missing from the standard translation, maybe in terms of language, but maybe also in terms of cultural baggage. And I clearly feel that Rashi has a very strong strong sense of gifting. He would— I will argue today that he is the Marcel Mauss of the rabbinic, of the classical rabbinical commentaries. So I reference Marcel Mauss.
Adam Mintz [00:10:57]:
That’s an interesting question. You know, scholars have spent a lot of time talking about that, and we don’t know the answer why Rashi sometimes uses French. You know, obviously sometimes he uses French and sometimes he doesn’t. When does he use French? And he doesn’t tell us. And, you know, that’s interesting. So you say that he uses French when he feels sometimes that the French can do a better job than the English. That’s why we always talk about Rabbi Riskin. Every once in a while, Rabbi Riskin would use a Yiddishism because Rabbi Riskin would say that word, the idea is only captured in Yiddish. There’s no English word for whatever idea. We would say it’s like chutzpah, right? There’s no English word for chutzpah, or chutzpah is an English word. So that’s a similar thing. Big means I can’t— this Rashi says I can’t say it in Hebrew. I need to say it in French, in something that we all understand.
Geoffrey Stern [00:12:00]:
And maybe I’m no expert by a long shot in French language or culture, but it seems to me the French have this ability to do things that some of us might consider very utilitarian, but they make it seem like it’s graceful. They make, make it seem like it’s beautiful. And in a sense, this Marcel Mauss argued that gifting is not what it appears to be. And on the one hand, we’re going to see in a second that he makes it very transactional, meaning to say that it has social function built into it. But the background is he is arguing against a form of economics and philosophy called utilitarianism. And what that believed was that everything is done for economic reasons and that it’s all a question of supply and demand and need and goods. And what Marcel Mauss was arguing in this is that if you look at the world only in that way, you’re missing a whole language of reciprocity, of social interactions. And that’s what he tried to bring out in the book called The Gift. And basically what he says is the name of the book, and it came came out in 1925, The Gift: Forms and Functions of Exchange in Archaic Societies. And according to Marcel Mauss, that is what is wrong with the free gift. A gift that does nothing to enhance solidarity is a contradiction, he wrote. Even the idea of a pure gift is a contradiction. By ignoring the universal custom of compulsory gifts, we make our own record incomprehensible to ourselves. Right across the globe and as far back as we can go in the history of human civilization, the major transfers of goods has been by cycles of obligatory returns of gifts. You know, Rabbi, if last week we talked about the dependencies and the codependencies that were baked into Mishpatim and the code of law, I think here we’re starting to look at the, the whole gift mitzvah is one that is designed to manipulate and navigate these reciprocal relationships. And so therefore, it’s part of this glue that brings us all together. You know, when I first heard of Marcel Mauss, the most famous and strange ritual that he talks about is something called the potlatch. And in the potlatch, there are great king or tribal head. He doesn’t even give you something. He invites you over to his house and he goes, you see that Rolls-Royce out there? I’m gonna burn it. You see that valuable painting over there? I’m gonna burn it in your honor. It was a way of transferring not so much to you, but showing something about yourself. And it had no, um, a visible rationale to it. And he came along and he says, no, everything that is done is done for a reason. The potlatch is an example of a total system of giving. Read this too fast and you miss the meaning. Spelt out, it means that each gift is part of a system of reciprocity in which the honor of giver and recipient are engaged. It is a total system in that every item of status or of spiritual or material possession is implicated for everyone in the whole community. The system is quite simple. Just the rule that every gift has to be returned in some specified way sets up a perpetual cycle of exchanges within and between generations. In some cases, the specified return is of equal value, producing a stable system of statuses. In others, it must exceed the value of the earlier gift, producing an escalating contest for honor. Think of me taking you out to a restaurant where it’s $30 a plate. You take me out to a restaurant that’s $40 a plate. That doesn’t sound so strange anymore. That’s potlatching. The whole society can be described by the catalog of transfers that map all the obligations between its members. The cycling gift system is the society. Sacrifice, in an earlier work he wrote, is a gift that compels the deity to make a return. Do ut des. I give so that you may give. He builds a case for a foundation to human society based on collective versus individual exchange practices. So here too, it goes against utilitarianism, but it also goes against this radical individualism that we were talking about last week. Fascinating, isn’t it?
Adam Mintz [00:17:10]:
It’s absolutely fascinating. So let’s talk about sacrifice, because this week we talk about the, the temple. But obviously that’s just an introduction to sacrifices. And he makes an amazing point, which is that sacrifice is a gift that compels the deity to make a return Do ut des means I give so that you may give. Now, that’s one thing when we do that with other human beings, but he’s saying you do that with God also. That’s amazing.
Geoffrey Stern [00:17:44]:
You know, it is. But also, if you look at it from the perspective of potlatching, and this will not seem very strange to you, Rabbi, where Mr. Shapiro gives $500,000 to dedicate the social hall and Mr. Levi gives $1,000,000 to dedicate the sanctuary, and all of a sudden we are giving to God, but through that God, we are creating these reciprocal relationships. But you’re right, it ties directly into everything that we’ve been talking about. There is no, I would guess, disconnect between giving one human to another and giving to God and so forth and so on.
Adam Mintz [00:18:25]:
Yeah, I mean, you, you raise the point about what God gives back to us. What humans give back to one another sometimes is honor, what we would say coveted, right? If you put your name on the main sanctuary as opposed to the social hall, so you get more coveted than the other guy. I don’t know that that’s when with, with God, that’s not exactly what God gives back to us. So that’s the example you gave is interesting. The reciprocity between humans is not the same as the reciprocity between, between man and God.
Geoffrey Stern [00:19:05]:
Okay, I’m going to grant you that. And now a word from our sponsor. This week we’re talking about the art and language of gifting. So I want to share something I created called VoiceGift Tag. It looks like a simple gift tag, but it records up to 60 seconds of your voice. Press record, say something you actually mean, a bracha, a joke, a memory, and attach it to your mishloach Manot. Long after the hamantaschen have been eaten and the wine drunk, they can press the button, hear your familiar voice, and say.
Adam Mintz [00:19:44]:
L’chaim!
Geoffrey Stern [00:19:44]:
L’chaim! Visit voice.gift. That’s http://www.voice.gift and use code Madlik for 15% off. And now back to our podcast. So we are now going to move into the only place that I know within Judaism and within our halacha that there are halachot of how to give a gift. Because on Purim is the only time I think— maybe I’m wrong— that we are required to give a gift. Not, as I said before, to someone who’s in need, not to someone who’s poor, but simply to exchange gifts. Something that our Christian brothers and sisters do on Christmas. They don’t have halachot for that. You know, there’s an amazing comic thing by Elon Gold where he talks about, thank God we Jews don’t have Christmas trees. And he goes into the halachot that we Jews would probably create if we had Christmas trees. How short is it? How long? How long does it stay in the water? How do you bring it in? Is it top down, bottom up? But in a sense, Rabbi, we’re going to start looking at the halachot of gifting because we do have that one moment in the calendar where we have to give. Are there any— are you struck in the same manner that it’s the only time we have a mitzvah?
Adam Mintz [00:21:05]:
Yeah, it’s very interesting, right? I mean, and the idea of Purim is an idea of reciprocity, is that I think that since in the kingdom of Achashveirosh, the reason the Jews were successful at the end is because there was unity among the people. Everybody fought for everybody else. So that’s expressed by, number one, taking care of the poor, but even reciprocity of gifts, because we’re all part of the process.
Geoffrey Stern [00:21:37]:
Absolutely. I did question for a second why we don’t make a bracha on Mishloach Manot. And I did find in some of the commentaries that they say you should not deliver your Mishloach Manot before you read the Megillah because it’s going to be covered under the Shekhiyanu. But it is interesting that there isn’t a bracha.
Adam Mintz [00:21:57]:
If you want to give a dvar Torah, here’s the dvar Torah. Why doesn’t charity charity get a bracha. Right? What an amazing mitzvah. But you don’t make a bracha. You don’t recite a blessing on charity. So there are two explanations that they give. One explanation they give is that you only make a bracha when there’s a fixed amount. Meaning you’re supposed to eat matzah, but you eat a certain amount of matzah. You’re supposed to take the lulav and etrog on Sukkot, but there’s a certain, you know, there’s a certain amount, the amount of times that you do it. The same thing with blowing the shofar. But there’s no amount of charity means the more the better. So therefore, you can only make a bracha on something that’s fixed. That’s number one. The second explanation, which is kind of a little more amusing, is that you can’t make a bracha on charity because charity is dependent on somebody else. If I give charity to a poor person, I can’t recite a blessing because what if the poor person doesn’t want my money? So therefore, I wouldn’t fulfill the mitzvah. So therefore, we don’t make a bracha. Something that’s dependent on someone else, we don’t make a bracha. But either way, that’s very good. And you’re right, that is absolutely the tradition. And in some shuls on Purim morning, they’ll announce that everybody should have in mind during the Shechianu the other mitzvot of Purim day. So that’s very good. Okay, great.
Geoffrey Stern [00:23:21]:
I love that you say that it’s dependent on the receiver, which again is that reciprocity.
Adam Mintz [00:23:28]:
Right. That’s a good— right. That’s approved.
Geoffrey Stern [00:23:30]:
So in Esther, Megillat Esther 9:19 It says, that is why village Jews who lived in unwalled towns observe the 14th day of the month of Adar and make it a day of merrymaking and feasting and as a holiday, an occasion for sending gifts to one another. Usually, you know, we always say you lose things in translation. In the Hebrew it says, al ken hayyudim hapruzim. Getting back to what you were saying before, that therefore the Jews that were spread out came together by giving these gifts one to another. Kind of emphasizes that in Esther 9:22, a few verses later. It says, the same days in which the Jews enjoyed relief from their foes, in the same month they had been transferred, they were to observe them as days of feasting and merrymaking, and as an occasion for sending gifts to one another and presents to the poor. So this is the point that I made earlier, that mishloach manot is by definition not charity. There are two separate mitzvot here. Mishloach manot sending gifts to a peer, to someone who is a friend. No economic utilitarian need. This is not the purpose of this gift. And there is an amazing article that I quote from the OU. It’s by Rabbi Dr. Ari Zivatovsky. We have quoted him.
Adam Mintz [00:24:58]:
We come back to him, right?
Geoffrey Stern [00:25:00]:
But if you want to see, uh, the real version of what Ari Gold was saying about what would Jews do to a Christmas tree, you see 2 or 3 pages of him breaking down the laws of how do you give shlach manot? I mean, it seems pretty easy. It says I have to give you a gift. So he says as follows, and I’m just quoting a little bit. I certainly recommend you all take a bigger look at it. Rav Shlomo Alkabetz, who lived in the 16th century and is best known as the author of Lechado Dodi, provides another reason in his work Manot HaLevi, which he sent to his father-in-law as Shaloch Manot. So here already we See, it’s not only foodstuff. I can send you a good, a good sefaria source sheet, and that will do us fine. He explains the mitzvah is intended to engender friendship and brotherhood among Jews. The other opinion is that it was a practical way to ensure that everybody will have sufficient food for the meal. So we have a utilitarian and we have a reciprocal relationship. And he bases it on the earlier verse Esther 3, where Haman said to King Achashveirosh, there is a certain people who are scattered and dispersed among the other people. Usually you and I take that to mean they were just living apart. The way he’s taking it is that Haman made a mistake. He thought we weren’t united. He thought that we were not talking to each other, and therefore the, uh, the cure was— and maybe We weren’t. Maybe we were so assimilated we forgot the ties that bind. So according to this Rabbi Alkobaraz, that’s what Shalach Manot means to do, to argue or to make a case that we are together by giving gifts one to another. According to Rav Alkobaraz, sending non-food items is acceptable because such a package also engenders friendship. It has halachic ramifications. While the Terumat Hadeshen rejects any item that cannot be used for the meal. And so this is all fascinating. The Mishnah in Megillah says the gifts are distributed to the poor. Rav Yosef taught a beraita that says, and sending portions one to the other, because it says portions in the plural, two portions to one person. The verse continues and gifts to the poor indicating two gifts to two people. So, so again, they start getting into what everybody sent to everybody else. So we have this two. So I think the tradition, you will agree, Rabbi, is you have to send at least two different foodstuffs to two different people, uh, to fulfill the, the commandment. Again, I love this two-ness because it has this reciprocity built in. You have fulfilled two mitzvot through us, our teacher that said the mitzvah of sending portions one to another and the mitzvah of gifts to the poor. To Rabbi Oshaya who was poor. So sometimes if you give a gift to a poor person, you get a double.
Adam Mintz [00:28:13]:
He doubled.
Geoffrey Stern [00:28:14]:
Yeah. So now we get into the narrative. The Gemara relates that Rabba sent Purim portions from the house of the Exilarch to Marei Bar Mar in the hands of Abaye, who was his nephew and the student. The Purim portions consisted of a sack full of dates and a cupful of roasted flour. Abaye said to him, now Marei will say the popular expression, even if a farmer becomes the king, the basket does not descend from his neck. So Rabbi, they are exchanging foods, but with those foods they’re exchanging expressions, they’re exchanging, uh, a different cultural baggage, right? Rabbi was named the head of the yeshiva in Pumbedita, and nevertheless he continued to send very plain gifts because he was impovished.
Adam Mintz [00:29:06]:
Now that’s interesting, right? So the type, the type of gift you send is also significant, right?
Geoffrey Stern [00:29:15]:
They were expressing themselves through the gifts. I just find it absolutely amazing. Mari Bar Mar sent back to him a sack full of ginger and a cup full of long papers, a much more expensive gift. Abaye said to him, the master Raba will now say, I sent him sweet items and he sent me pungent ones. So again, what I love is they are exploring the language of gifting, that by picking the particular gift, you are saying something. In describing that same incident, Abaye said, when I left the house of Master Rabba to go to Maribamar, I was already satiated. However, when I arrived there in Maribamar’s house, they served me 60 plates of 60 kinds of dishes. And, uh, he goes on, this explains the folk saying that people say the The poor man is hungry and does not know it. That reminds me of my grandmother who grew up in a tenement in the Lower East Side. And she said, we were poor, but we didn’t know it. I just love that they are communicating through these gifts, these handpicked gifts that they give. The Gemara relates that Rabbi Bar Avin and Rabbi Chanina Bar Avin would exchange their meals with each other to fulfill their obligation of sending portions on Purim. Combine the two traditions.
Adam Mintz [00:30:42]:
Well, that’s actually the most logical thing, because if you— I mean, that’s, that’s real reciprocity. That’s real friendship, is to exchange meals. That’s, you know, that’s not just symbolic, that’s real.
Geoffrey Stern [00:30:56]:
But I love the fact that, uh, at a minimum, so it’s nothing out of your pocket, I take what I was going to eat and I give it to you, you take what I was going to eat and I give it to me. Uh, there’s also, I believe, a Midrash that in, in, in heaven, everybody is seated next to somebody else and their hands are tied straight. So what they do is they simply feed the person sitting next to them. And in hell, they have the same association, but they can’t figure out to feed the person sitting next to them.
Adam Mintz [00:31:32]:
So that’s amazing. Yeah.
Geoffrey Stern [00:31:34]:
So I love this. I just I just love this. In Mishnah Torah, Maimonides writes, what is the nature of our obligation for this feast? A person should eat meat and prepare an attractive feast as his means permit. He should drink wine until he becomes intoxicated and falls asleep in a stupor. Similarly, a person is obligated to send 2 portions of meat, 2 other cooked dishes, or 2 other foods to a friend, as implied by Esther sending portions of food to one to another. So Rabbi Riskin took this reciprocity and this fact that the Shalach Manot was meant to address the m’fuzar, the disparate nature of the Jewish people. He says you have to send a cooked food because we have— we think normally, Rabbi Riskin said, of kashrut as something that divides us. I don’t eat in your house, you don’t eat in my house. And what Shalach Manot requiring a cooked food was saying is that you will eat food from my kitchen and I will eat food from your kitchen, and therefore Kashrut will bring us together, not send us apart. But again, just another language of gifting.
Adam Mintz [00:32:46]:
Fantastic. That’s so good.
Geoffrey Stern [00:32:50]:
So I want to wish everybody a Shabbat Shalom. You, Adam, in Hong Kong, and no matter where you are, discover as we approach Purim this wonderful language of gift giving and what is hidden in our texts and in the language the halacha.
Adam Mintz [00:33:08]:
Fantastic. Shabbat shalom, everybody, and happy almost Purim. Enjoy.
Geoffrey Stern [00:33:13]:
All the best.



